Patience with Children! C’mon Really?

Uggh, the “P” word. Yes, we all knew the time would come. The fourth word on the Fruits of the Spirit List (Galatians 5:22). It’s here, our month long look at patience. Funny how it falls in the same month as Mother’s Day?

There is nothing more challenging to me than the virtue of patience. It wasn’t something I thought too much about until I became a mother. And then it all became very clear. God gave us children so we could learn patience…

I am so thankful and blessed to have two amazing daughters. They not only teach me about patience, but so many other important lessons. They are a joy to my husband and me. As with any mom though, there are those moments where I feel my patience is tested beyond anything I can handle.

Recently my youngest daughter Isabelle (pictured here) turned five. This is a milestone in her young life and she makes sure everyone knows it. In fact, just this week as I sat down to write this devotional, I made it very clear to Isabelle that I needed a few minutes by myself to work on the computer. I told her that after I was done we would go to the park. But, the park had a condition. She could not ask me when we were going, or how many minutes it would be until we left. (Believe me, this child can talk incessantly to a wall, and ask 25 questions in three minutes.) She had to trust that we would leave for the park in 30 minutes.

She accepted the condition with her usual statement these days, “Five years-old, remember?” Can you just see it? Her hands on her hips, her head cocked back and a look in those beautiful eyes that says, “Mom, I’m five, surely I can handle this condition.” Can you just sense the sarcasm? I could feel the hair rising on the back of my neck, but I took a deep breath and typed away—well I kind of pounded.

A few minutes later the non-verbal communication started. Sighs and moans could be heard from the end of the hall, as well as, stomping feet. It was all Isabelle could do to not ask when we were going to the park. You may wonder who is struggling with patience here. Well, to make this clear as mud, I think we both feed off of each other. Isabelle is just plain impatient when she has to wait for something, and I feed off of her many emotions and become impatient with her.

Impatience is a real emotion. We all face it from time to time, and some of us more than others. But it’s not experiencing the emotion that’s the problem, it’s how we react in those moments.

“Preach the Word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.” 2 Timothy 4:2

In context (II Timothy 4:1-3) Paul is expressing to Timothy the importance of preaching the gospel so that it can be spread to the whole world. This is the most important job the Church has been given. It may not always be easy to take a stand and tell others about Christ, but Paul wanted Timothy to encourage the Church at how important it is.

I once asked my mom what resources she and my dad had for parenting when my sister and me were growing up. She said that she mostly turned to the Bible. We are blessed with many wonderful books, conferences, classes, etc. these days, but sometimes I find the best resource to be the Bible.

And I find this scripture so applicable for correcting children. One, we are to preach the Word. What better opportunity do we have to tell our children about Jesus than in the moments of correcting them? Secondly, we are to always be prepared. There are seasons of a child’s development and some seasons are easier than others, but we are instructed to be prepared all the time. Thirdly, when it comes to rebuking and correcting we are to do it with patience. That’s not easy, but with practice it is possible.

I have found that when I humbly come before the Lord and confess my impatience, my spirit is calmed and I am given a new outlook on the situation. This is especially true when dealing with Isabelle. It is so easy to roll my eyes and plead with God to deal with her, but in reality it is me that needs to be dealt with. Once I am calm and patient, the careful instruction I need to give Isabelle flows from my mouth.

Thank you Jesus for your gentle reminder about the importance of patience with children.